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Alcoholics are not powerless over alcohol

Alcoholism is not even about alcohol

The myth that people with alcoholism are powerless over alcohol is deeply misinformed, and just as dangerous. Addiction arises from inside of people – their drive to excessively drink, use other drugs, eat, gamble, and so on. To think that alcohol is the problem in alcoholism is to believe it has a magnetic power to enslave people. This is sheer nonsense. And when people think that their problem is a chemical in a bottle, they focus on trying to resist the chemical rather than doing what is truly useful: trying to understand their minds. 

Of course, if we are talking about physical dependence then the chemical is relevant, but as readers of this blog or either of my books (“The Heart of Addiction,” and “Breaking Addiction”) know, the real problem in addiction is not physical addiction, which can affect anybody and is readily treatable, but why some people compulsively repeat their addictive behaviors even when there is no physical dependence at all.
 
Addiction is all about seeking a remedy for overwhelming feelings of helplessness, and the exact form of an addiction, whether drinking or eating or watching online pornography, is no more than a focus for the addiction, not its cause. This is why people so often change the form of their addiction, moving from alcoholism to compulsive gambling tocompulsive shopping, and on and on. Wouldn’t it be strange if people really were powerless over the focus of their addiction? When a person switched from alcoholism to compulsive gambling we’d have to say he was now powerless over something new. As the focus shifted there could be no end to the things he was powerless over – his powerlessness could spread like wildfire! (“I used to be powerless over just alcohol, but now peanut butter has me in its grip.”)
 
The notion that people are powerless over the focus of their addiction is also terribly demoralizing. Addictions are neither more nor less than compulsions, psychological behaviors most people have to some degree. That fact has been a great relief to people with addictions who have been made to feel different and less than the rest of humanity. But if you buy the idea that you are powerless over the chemical in a bottle (or the peanut butter on the shelf or the offshore gambling website) then you are deprived of this honest relief. Instead, you must admit your worst fear: you are in fact different and certainly less capable than everyone around you who is able to drink with impunity.
 
“We admitted we were powerless over alcohol” is, of course, Step One of Alcoholics Anonymous. 12-step programs have been statistically shown to have a 5-10% success rate. Step One isn’t the only reason for this, but it is clearly a part of the problem.
Posted on Sunday, June 17, 2012 at 11:41PM by Registered CommenterLance Dodes, M.D. | Comments10 Comments | References253 References

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August 9, 2012 | Unregistered Commenteran alcoholic

I'm almost finished reading The Heart of Addiction, and then I will read Breaking Addiction because the first was so good.
In 1988 I stopped drinking b/c I was raising my 5-year-old daughter alone, and I knew I couldn't continue it. I went to an alcohol couseling center, where the girl (she was about 25 or so - I was 30 at the time) told me at each of my visits (totalling 8 altogether) to go to AA. I finally went, and that's how I stopped. However, I did not take all the "suggestions" that they so strongly recommend. I just clung to Tradition 3, which states that "the only requirement is a desire to stop drinking." As time passed, I went to less meetings, and although I've never had alcohol since I quit, after 13 or so years sober, I was prescribed pain pills, and I became addicted. Truly psychologically addicted as you describe so poignantly. I had no desire to go to NA, so I tried going back to AA, but I didn't stop until May 2012. I go to NA, and I have to say that it's helping me, but there are definitely parts of it that I just can't agree with, so I started researching addiciton, and found your book, which has been a tremendous help to me. I do have a therapist, but he is semi-retired, so we talk on the phone since he lives in Mass. and I'm in NY. Anyway, my daughter (29 now) was very, very hurt upon discovering this "new addiction" and has not spoken to me since March. We were extremely close, and I know she feels tremendous betrayal, and does not talk to me at all. I sent her a letter asking her what I could do to re-establish some trust (on the advice of my therapist), and her reply was very business like: "...while I anticipate eventually speaking to you in the future, I am not ready yet. I am still processing my own feelings."
Anyway, I wanted your advice on what to do. Thanks!!!
And thanks so much for writing these books!!!

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

I'm almost finished reading The Heart of Addiction, and then I will read Breaking Addiction because the first was so good.
In 1988 I stopped drinking b/c I was raising my 5-year-old daughter alone, and I knew I couldn't continue it. I went to an alcohol couseling center, where the girl (she was about 25 or so - I was 30 at the time) told me at each of my visits (totalling 8 altogether) to go to AA. I finally went, and that's how I stopped. However, I did not take all the "suggestions" that they so strongly recommend. I just clung to Tradition 3, which states that "the only requirement is a desire to stop drinking." As time passed, I went to less meetings, and although I've never had alcohol since I quit, after 13 or so years sober, I was prescribed pain pills, and I became addicted. Truly psychologically addicted as you describe so poignantly. I had no desire to go to NA, so I tried going back to AA, but I didn't stop until May 2012. I go to NA, and I have to say that it's helping me, but there are definitely parts of it that I just can't agree with, so I started researching addiciton, and found your book, which has been a tremendous help to me. I do have a therapist, but he is semi-retired, so we talk on the phone since he lives in Mass. and I'm in NY. Anyway, my daughter (29 now) was very, very hurt upon discovering this "new addiction" and has not spoken to me since March. We were extremely close, and I know she feels tremendous betrayal, and does not talk to me at all. I sent her a letter asking her what I could do to re-establish some trust (on the advice of my therapist), and her reply was very business like: "...while I anticipate eventually speaking to you in the future, I am not ready yet. I am still processing my own feelings."
Anyway, I wanted your advice on what to do. Thanks!!!
And thanks so much for writing these books!!!

August 23, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterKathy

It seems to me that the question of power can be used to one's psychological advantage. "Who has power here, me or alcohol?" Perhaps a compromise is to admit we were powerless (Dr. Dodes is correct to note the past tense were) but that as a sober person, we now have power. For me, there was a genuine psychological boost in recognizing I had defeated alcohol, that I had returned to power.

The danger, of course, is that thinking I have power over alcohol equates with being able to drink whenever I want, to take it or leave it. Hopefully, though, by getting to the root of the problem (rather than just the symptom) this resolves itself.

Without a doubt, though, I must agree that admitting powerlessness is self-defeating. If one has no power, why not just continue using and drinking? It's a wrong-headed approach, in my opinion.

October 30, 2012 | Unregistered CommenterRDR

Thanks for clarifying this -- I knew those people at AA were lying to me! Tonight I can have a glass of champagne to celebrate my anniversary! Thank you Dr. Dodes

November 6, 2012 | Unregistered Commentergoodnews

I am relieved to finally read about a medical doctor working with addictions who shares my current view on "habits". I have felt disgruntled by the term "powerless". I have experienced this "problem" firsthand and could never come to grips with addiction being "labeled" a disease (I haven't adopted that theory, personally). What I have come to appreciate, however, is that others have beliefs, theories, and treatments which counter my own. I have empathy and acceptance of that while at the same time moving forward in my thinking and "layman" research for the betterment of all who suffer in these situations. I am thankful to have read this article along with another posted in Psychology Today, "The Truth about Addictive Triggers" (December, 2013). If a person believes they can NEVER consume alcohol again in this lifetime for their health and wellbeing, good for them. While on another note, expressing it is my opinion that while our "memories" of addictive/compulsive behaviors are ingrained in the brain, neuroplasticity, therapy, life-skills (positive coping), etc. can all combine for effective alleviation of suffering and positive life changes and continuity without the constant fear and anxiety of "disease symptoms' reappearances". Personal responsibility for self-care and self-health are the only options. I hope people do not become "addicted" to being sober. I do feel we ALL have the capacity at any point in time or trauma to fall into addictive tendencies, and most assuredly those individuals who have previously suffered with such. We ALL need to be in tune to our minds and bodies for providing ourselves with the utmost wellbeing in our lives. We ALL need to value ourselves as "worth" the investment, because that is what we are...Worthy. We can work it for ourselves, and change it if need be. Fall down, get up. What a great freedom! Thank you Dr. Dodes for your passion and your work. I am most assuredly not assuming you share all of my views I have put forth in this post, but I absolutely appreciate your perspective and research into this field.

January 9, 2014 | Unregistered CommenterMelissa

very very nice...

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